It's My Christmas!

Some years, the holidays may not feel all marshmallows and snowflakes. There are times we've felt maybe a little less in the holiday spirit. Maybe we've suffered a family or personal loss, we might be having financial setbacks, or perhaps we question the meaning of Christmas or of life itself. And sometimes there's a pandemic.

Life isn't easy. It's times like these that I flash back to other times, other Christmases. I also remember places I've worked in the past and the people I've met along the way. In particular, I remember when I worked with individuals with developmental disabilities some years ago. I would pick up my client at a group home where she resided.

While waiting for my client, Tilly, I got to know some of the other residents at the home, including a proactive Conure parrot named Sam, who would open his cage and hop across the floor to greet me when I arrived. He bit almost everyone he came in contact with, but luckily not me. I found the trick to getting along with Sam was to ignore him.

There was Morris, an easy-going comic book collector, who always called me "Ham" instead of  Pam. I actually taught Morris to write his first and last name, something the staff said he wasn't capable of learning.  Then there was my client, Tilly, who as an older member of the group enjoyed being a den-mother of sorts to this diverse menangerie. But the client I'll never forget is Benny, a congenial guy in his mid-20s with Down Syndrome.

I don't wish to sound patronizing about people with Down Syndrome in saying that Benny was "cute," but cute he was. Cute and lovable, with a ready smile and his own unique sense of humor.

When Benny complained to another resident, Karla, that he didn't want to go to the dentist again because he had so many cavities that needed fillings, Karla admonished him for snacking on sweets and drinking soda all the time. "You really to need to watch that soda!" she said sternly to him.

Benny used this reproach as an opportunity to tease his friend. Whenever Karla was around, Benny would grab a soda from the fridge and taunt her with it. "I'm drinking soda!" he would proclaim gleefully, following her around with his can of Pepsi.

Annoyed, Karla would shake her head and scold him, which made him tease her even more. I don't know if Benny actually drank all that soda; I think it was just a handy prop to use when being his jokester self.

One day close to Christmas, Benny came into the room and announced, "It's my birthday!"

"It's not your birthday," Tilly pointed out. "Your birthday was in October."

"It's my birthday," Benny said again.

The other residents chimed in, reminding Benny that it couldn't possibly be his birthday again so soon.

"OK, then it's my Christmas," Benny said, looking at all the twinkling lights and holiday decor throughout the room.

"No...it can't be YOUR Christmas!" everyone laughed.

"It's my Christmas!" Benny insisted. He pointed at the gifts under the corner tree, one of which displayed his name in bright colors.

"See - it IS my Christmas! It's not my birthday, so it's my Christmas."

He went around the room and tapped each person, one by one. "It's your Christmas...it's your Christmas...it's your Christmas," he said with uncharacteristic seriousness.

Everyone was silent; no one could think of a thing to say to refute his statement. 

So...is it YOUR Christmas?